It takes a good habit to replace a bad habit.

I welcome each new day with a hopeful expectancy that I, too, will rise above the ordinary. For I am not content to live a merely 'normal' life or settle for an average existence. No, I am destined for more - much, much more.

But fear is confusing. It tears you in two. Half of you wants to run far, far away, but the other half is paralyzed, frozen, immovable. And the hard part is that you never know which half is going to win.

Mostly I think I've learned to trust God more. I mean, if I start getting worried or freaked, I just try to put it in God's hands. Sometimes I imagine God cradling the globe in his hands, and I tell myself that as long as I'm with God, the Creator of the universe, I can be comfortable and at home anyplace on the planet.

I mean all this focus on how we look on the outside. It's just all wrong

Shut off the internal bashing.

To the casual observer it looks like I have moved on since I go around wearing my little happy mask all day. I smile and laugh and carry on like my heart's still in one piece, but beneath it all, I am dying.