I sit waiting for things that I can't refuse.

I've always got to have one impossible dream on the back burner.

You can't get blase about something you haven't done yet.

I'm a frustrated stand-up comic. If you hand me a microphone and I get one laugh, then I'll go on for 20 minutes.

In my day, the drug was alcohol and the weapon was a fist, so it was very sort of innocent and primitive. Now you've got drugs, guns, and knives, which are so lethal.

If you're a gardener you don't need a gym. [...] You're always carrying large sacks of manure all over.

Be like a duck. Calm on the surface, but always paddling like the dickens underneath.