If (Black) is going for victory, he is practically forced to allow his opponent to get some kind of well-known positional advantage.

Chess isn't football or hockey.

Later, I began to succeed in decisive games. Perhaps because I realized a very simple truth: not only was I worried, but also my opponent

To play for a draw (at any rate with White) is to some degree a crime against chess.

For pleasure you can read the games collections of Andersson and Chigorin, but for benefit you should study Tarrasch, Keres and Bronstein.

In my games I have sometimes found a combination intuitively simply feeling that it must be there. Yet I was not able to translate my thought processes into normal human language.

I'd like to always be romantic in chess. Sadly, this doesn't always work like that.