When I was in high school, I liked to pretend that I was a Russian foreign exchange student. I would do things like go into a pizza restaurant and tell them Id never had pizza before, and theyd bring me into the kitchen and show me how to make an American pizza. Its really fun.

When I try to use incantations at work i often find they have no effect and my coworkers just laugh at me.

I think participating in "Gishwhes" is a crash course in facing our fears: people go to crowded shopping malls wearing scuba gear, order from a fast food restaurant in Shakespearean verse or jump out of airplanes among many other tasks.

Meditating takes on a different quality when someone taps you on the shoulder and says, "Dad, why are you sleeping like that?"

We are bound only by the limits of our imaginations.

I'm just trying to remember what self-respect feels like. It's a fading memory.

Even small acts of kindness can make a profound difference to somebody else.