What I've found is that the religion that matters, the real religion is love.

The crowd did not dream when they laid down their money that they would see a total eclipse of the Sonny!

How many push ups do you do? I don't know. I only starts counting when it starts hurting

I have a beautiful daughter, beautiful wife.They look like me, we all happy and I don't have no trouble. And I ain't that much in love with no woman to go through that hell - ain't no one woman that good.

Hittin' hard don't mean nothing if you don't find nothin' to hit.

Be loud, be pretty and keep their black-hatin' asses in their chairs

My way of joking is to tell the truth. That's the funniest joke in the world.