Life is always going to be stranger than fiction, because fiction has to be convincing, and life doesn't.

Google can bring you back 100,000 answers. A librarian can bring you back the right one.

None of us know where our stories come from. That's why writers make fun of people who ask us where we get our ideas... because we don't know.

The best advice I can give on this is, once it's done, to put it away until you can read it with new eyes. Finish the short story, print it out, then put it in a drawer and write other things. When you're ready, pick it up and read it, as if you've never read it before. If there are things you aren't satisfied with as a reader, go in and fix them as a writer: that's revision.

Look. I brought you here to give you a choice-" "You didn't bring us here," said Nick. "You're here," said Bod. "I wanted you here. I came here. You followed me. Same thing.

This little piggy went to Hades This little piggy stayed home This little piggy ate raw and steaming human flesh This little piggy violated virgins And this little piggy clambered over a heap of dead bodies to get to the top

Writers are liars my dear, surely you know that by now?