He was the toast to her butter.

Some things were beyond understanding.

How're the Broncos doing?" "Like a bunch of carrots." "Is that bad?" "Can carrots play baseball?" "I guess not." "Then you have your answer.

I have a great wife and it's very easy to be romantic because it makes her happy and then my life is so much better when she's happy.

A surprise trigonometry quiz that everyone in class fails? Must be in the Lord’s plan to give us challenges.

Me. A bad boy. For eating boiled peanuts in the graveyard. Go figure.

Knowing there's one thing I still haven't told you: I now believe, by the way, that miracles can happen.