The longer and more carefully we look at a funny story, the sadder it becomes.

There are certain words which are nearer and dearer to a man than any others.

Gambling is the great leveller. All men are equal- at cards.

it's not my job to preach a sermon. Art is anyhow a homily. My job is to speak in living images, not in arguments. I must exhibit life full-face, not discuss life.

I tell everyone very plainly that I take bribes, but what kind of bribes? Why, greyhound puppies. That's a totally different matter.

At the end of the table, the secretary was reading the decision in some case, but in such a mournful and monotonous voice, that the condemned man himself would have fallen asleep while listening to it. The judge, no doubt, would have been the first of all to do so, had he not entered into an engrossing conversation while it was going on.

They don’t listen to me, they don’t hear me, they don’t see me.