Inject a few raisins of conversation into the tasteless dough of existence.

By nature and doctrines I am addicted to the habit of discovering choice places wherein to feed.

Hospitality in the prairie country is not limited. Even if your enemy passes your way, you must feed him before you shoot him.

Except in streetcars one should never be unnecessarily rude to a lady.

I'll give you the whole secret to short story writing. Here it is. Rule 1: Write stories that please yourself. There is no Rule 2.

History is bright and fiction dull with homely men who have charmed women.

There is one day that is ours. There is one day when all we Americans who are not self-made go back to the old home to eat saleratus biscuits and marvel how much nearer to the porch the old pump looks than it used to. Thanksgiving Day is the one day that is purely American.