The effort to try to feel happy is often precisely the thing that makes us miserable.
Oliver BurkemanConfronting the worst-case scenario saps it of much of its anxiety-inducing power. Happiness reached via positive thinking can be fleeting and brittle, negative visualization generates a vastly more dependable calm.
Oliver BurkemanTrue security lies in the unrestrained embrace of insecurity - in the recognition that we never really stand on solid ground, and never can.
Oliver BurkemanThe routines of almost all famous writers, from Charles Darwin to John Grisham, similarly emphasise specific starting times, or number of hours worked, or words written. Such rituals provide a structure to work in, whether or not the feeling of motivation or inspiration happens to be present. They let people work alongside negative or positive emotions, instead of getting distracted by the effort of cultivating only positive ones. โInspiration is for amateurs,โ the artist Chuck Close once memorably observed. โThe rest of us just show up and get to work.
Oliver BurkemanWho says you need to wait until you 'feel like' doing something in order to start doing it? The problem, from this perspective, isn't that you don't feel motivated; it's that you imagine you need to feel motivated. If you can regard your thoughts and emotions about whatever you're procrastinating on as passing weather, you'll realise that your reluctance about working isn't something that needs to be eradicated or transformed into positivity. You can coexist with it. You can note the procrastinatory feelings and act anyway.
Oliver Burkeman