The very pink of perfection.

Friendship is a disinterested commerce between equals; love, an abject intercourse between tyrants and slaves.

The premises being thus settled, I proceed to observe that the concatenation of self-existence, proceeding in a reciprocal duplicate ratio, naturally produces a problematical dialogism, which in some measure proves that the essence of spirituality may be referred to the second predicable.

One man is born with a silver spoon in his mouth, and the other with a wooden ladle.

The ingratitude of the world can never deprive us of the conscious happiness of having acted with humanity ourselves.

Filial obedience is the first and greatest requisite of a state; by this we become good subjects to our emperors, capable of behaving with just subordination to our superiors, and grateful dependents on heaven; by this we become fonder of marriage, in order to be capable of exacting obedience from others in our turn; by this we become good magistrates, for early submission is the truest lesson to those who would learn to rule. By this the whole state may be said to resemble one family.

The best way to make your audience laugh is to start laughing yourself.