The only people who think children are carefree are the ones who've forgotten their own childhood.
Madness, and then illumination.
Every person is defined by the communities she belongs to.
There's a reason why every human society has fiction. It teaches us how to be 'good,' to behave in a way that is for the benefit of the whole community.
Welcome to the human race. Nobody controls his own life, Ender.
But the truth is that no person ever understands another, from beginning to end of life, there is no truth that can be known, only the story we imagine to be true, the story they really believe to be true about themselves; and all of them lies.