Art is the only serious thing in the world. And the artist is the only person who is never serious.

Like dear St. Francis of Assisi I am wedded to Poverty: but in my case the marriage is not a success.

Ultimately the bond of all companionship, whether in marriage or in friendship, is conversation, and conversation must have a common basis, and between two people of widely different culture the only common basis possible is the lowest level.

Now produce your explanation and pray make it improbable.

The only thing that sustains one through life is the consciousness of the immense inferiority of everybody else, and this is a feeling that I have always cultivated.

God grant me the serenity to accept that people are ignorant, the courage to uphold the law when I'm hostile, & the wisdom to realize that murder is illegal.

We are the zanies of sorrow. We are clowns whose hearts are broken.