The greatest of all sins is stupidity.

No man should have a secret from his wife. She invariably finds it out.

The ability of the theist to misunderstand a thing is directly proportional to the obviousness of the thing.

America is one long expectoration.

My dear young lady, there was a great deal of truth; I dare say, in what you said, and you looked very pretty while you said it, which is much more important.

A community is infinitely more brutalised by the habitual employment of punishment than it is by the occasional occurence of crime.

Every effect that one produces gives one an enemy. To be popular one must be a mediocrity.