If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they'll kill you.

Come, dear, [Gwendolen rises] we have already missed five, if not six, trains. To miss any more might expose us to comment on the platform.

The truth is rarely pure and never simple.

I have grown tired of the articulate utterances of men and things. The Mystical in Art, the Mystical in Life, the Mystical in Nature this is what I am looking for. It is absolutely necessary for me to find it somewhere.

Oh, no doubt the cod is a splendid swimmer - admirable for swimming purposes but not for eating.

Nowadays to be intelligible is to be found out.

When asked what he thought of sports, Oscar Wilde replied, "I approve of any activity that requires the wearing of special clothing.