If you want to be witty, say what you think at all times

The best way to make children good is to make them happy.

I am not at all cynical, I have merely got experience, which, however, is very much the same thing.

I don’t write this letter to put bitterness into your heart, but to pluck it out of mine. For my own sake I must forgive you.

We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.

I quite agree with Dr. Nordau's assertion that all men of genius are insane, but Dr. Nordau forgets that all sane people are idiots.

Never love anyone who treats you like you're ordinary.