Everyone should keep someone else's diary.

The typewriting machine, when played with expression, is no more annoying than the piano when played by a sister or near relation.

It is better to have a permanent income than to be fascinating.

I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.

But beauty, real beauty, ends where an intellectual expression begins. Intellect is in itself a mode of exaggeration, and destroys the harmony of any face.

Bore: a man who is never unintentionally rude.

You have always told me it was Ernest. I have introduced you to every one as Ernest. You answer to the name of Ernest. You look as if your name was Ernest. You are the most earnest-looking person I ever saw in my life. It is perfectly absurd your saying that your name isn't Ernest.