Just another proof, of course, of what I often say - it takes all sorts to make a world.

Everything in life that’s any fun, as somebody wisely observed, is either immoral, illegal or fattening.

It's not that I don't trust you, Dunstable, it's simply that I don't trust you.

She looked as if she had been poured into her clothes and had forgotten to say 'when.'

It is fatal to let any dog know that he is funny, for he immediately loses his head and starts hamming it up.

If there is one thing I dislike, it is the man who tries to air his grievances when I wish to air mine.

No novelists any good except me. Sovietski -- yah! Nastikoff -- bah! I spit me of zem all. No novelists anywhere any good except me. P. G. Wodehouse and Tolstoi not bad. Not good, but not bad. No novelists any good except me.