Tim was dead. And he's always been a loser. I'd be damned if I was going to be the victim of a loser - or anyone else.

Happiness is German engineering, Italian cooking, and Belgian chocolate.

After I shut the door behind me, I heard Darryl say "of course eating him would work too.

Want to play some Battleship?” I wasn’t leaving him alone with that thing in there. Chad armed himself with a notebook, and we went to war. Historically, war has often been used as a distraction for problems at home.

It is one of those lessons that every child should learn: Don't play with fire, sharp objects, or ancient artifacts.

Charles looked at her thoughtfully. "People talk to you," he said. "That could be useful.

Obstreperous, ‘huh,” said Tad. “I see you’ve been using that Big Word of the Day calendar I got you last Christmas.” “That is irrefragable,” I told him solemnly.