A friend told me to listen to my heart. Another friend told me to listen to my gut. Maybe I need an autopsy, because right now my colon is kind of iffy.

Younger kids, they understand that things aren't so perfect with their father or with their mother.

As you get older you realize your parents don't look so dumb - and that you're not as smart as you thought you were.

Two or three times a week, I drive by the houses of numbers 78-100 just to rub it in.

The best part of being married is... you don't have to explain a lot of things. Those wordless moments when you both know that what you witnessed together is funny, idiotic, or really sweet. Being connected is pretty miraculous.

When you get busy, the priorities change. In your twenties, you hang out with who you were in school with. Then you grow up and you hang out with the people you're playing ball with, things you like doing with. When you get married, it changes a bit and you lose some friends, or you gain other friends. You gain couple-y friends. It changes again when you have children, and then when your children are the focus of your life.

Having a baby dragged me, kicking and screaming, from the world of self-absorption.