I was an academic and I lost my assignment at Harvard. Meanwhile, [David Petraeus] gets invited to Harvard to become a fellow.

My peers are all in sensitive jobs - at the C.I.A., the National Security Council, working for the Department of Defense. They can't stand up for me in public.

The national media don't know me. They know the caricature that was created of me by journalists who were frankly jealous of my access. And it was a very negative caricature. There's this propensity for blaming a woman. It comes down to implicit bias. There are so many studies that show this.

A lot of women were betting on me because there were so few role models and I let them down. They had put me on a pedestal. I maybe enjoyed being in that limelight, but I couldn't reverse what I had done.

Sometime ago, I teamed up with a former Marine attack helicopter pilot. We were both frustrated by biased coverage of women in the military and said, let's form some kind of nonprofit entity where we can start highlighting the prevalence of bias in the media.

My local paper, The New York Times, Yahoo News, CBS, and The Washington Post, all agreed to stop using the word 'mistress.' The big one was the Associated Press. They made a style change, and it's the gold standard that sets the guide for news outlets around the world. That's a small step for the American language, a medium step for feminism, and a huge step for me personally.

As a feminist, I'll wear whatever I want to.