There's something about breaking up with someone - you just look hotter than you ever did before.

I'm used to going into the studio and smoking and drinking until three in the morning. But I can't drink as much because I'm breastfeeding. See this glass of wine? Before, I'd have, like, four of them. Now, one is good. Oh, and I quit smoking. . . I've exorcised a lot of my demons, but I'm still working on myself. I think I'll be a work in progress for the rest of my life.

My stage show is raw and unpredictable.

The last time I checked, the only difference between my gay friends and I is who we choose to love. I'm not sure how that warrants a loss of rights, but it needs to stop. What ever happened to liberty and justice for all?

There are 50 new tabloids every year, and I'm in them, and I read them, and I do stupid things.

My life was once whiskey, tears and cigarettes... now it's snot, tears and a color of poop. Bliss. I do miss the whiskey, though.

I dedicate my love and whole heart this Memorial Day to my Dad, a soldier, who like many others, suffers in silence with pride and honor.