I knew that I was gay, I knew it. I just couldn't see myself as a gay woman, even though that's where my heart was.

I knew that I was gay, I knew it. I just couldn't see myself as a gay woman, even though that's where my heart was.

When it’s quiet in my head like this, that’s when the voice doesn’t need to tell me how pathetic I am. I know it in the deepest part of me. When it’s quiet like this, that’s when I truly hate myself.

There's a fine line between being private and being ashamed.

I justified it in so many ways. I had a very, very long and difficult struggle with my sexuality.

Restriction generates yearning. You want what you cannot have.

I would eat 300 calories a day - a lot of Jell-O and no-sugar everything, of course. I was doing Pilates, weight-training, circuit training; over lunch I would run on a treadmill in my dressing room with a fan on my face so I wouldn't sweat my makeup off.