Very little in this world makes sense.

When I was younger, I loved graveyards. They weren't spooky so much as mysterious. Each tombstone another story to uncover. Another life to learn about. Now that I'm older - I won't say how old - I hate graveyards. The only life - or rather death - I see in the tombstones is my own.

I ate him," said the homunculus, biting into his sausage. The kids couldn't hide their looks of horror. He smiled, sausage juice running down his chin. "Oh, don't worry - I cooked him first. I'm not a barbarian.

Who needs to go somewhere when you can read about it.

It was like walking into a treasure trove of books, hoarded by pirate librarians.

...books were better than travel.

Generally speaking, books don't cause much harm. Except when you read them, that is. Then they cause all kinds of problems. Books can, for example, give you ideas. I don't know if you've ever had an idea before, but, if you have, you know how much trouble an idea can get you into.