I never trust anyone who's more excited about success than about doing the thing they want to be successful at.

Things are rarely just crazy enough to work, but they're frequently just crazy enough to fail hilariously.

If at first you don't succeed, that's one data point.

I'm not sure why we romanticize 'young love,' or love in general...It just leads to the idea that either your love is pure, perfect and eternal, and you are storybook-compatible in every way with no problems, or you're LYING when you say 'I love you.

Sometimes I mistake this for a universe that cares.

The universe is probably littered with the one-planet graves of cultures which made the sensible economic decision that there's no good reason to go into space-each discovered, studied, and remembered by the ones who made the irrational decision.

I don't have hard numbers about this, but the impression I get is that the amount of eyeballs you get from being on the humor shelf at Barnes & Noble - it is almost insignificant.