There is, of course, no reason for the existence of the male sex except that one sometimes needs help with moving the piano.

If I do not do sensible things about investments I shall spend my old age in a workhouse, where nobody will understand my jokes.

sentences were used by man before words and still come with the readiness of instinct to his lips. They, and not words, are the foundations of all language. ... Your cat has no words, but it has considerable feeling for the architecture of the sentence in relation to the problem of expressing climax.

the reward for total abstinence from alcohol seems, illogically enough, to be the capacity for becoming intoxicated without it.

He is every other inch a gentleman.

it is necessary that we should all have a little of the will to die, because otherwise we would find the performance of our biological duty of death too difficult.

There is no wider gulf in the universe than yawns between those on the hither and thither side of vital experience.