Been sitting at home all weekend writing for MTV Movie Awards - unfortunately MTV won't let me do my strip routine ala Magic Mike.

I've got a swimming pool and I pretend to be like a mermaid, like in the middle of the night. It kind of de-stresses me.

For a comedienne, you have to have a little tragedy or a dark side, just not too much. Otherwise it's too disruptive.

I think that actresses can be in all different shapes and sizes, but it is a profession, and as an actor, your body is one of your big tools. So you've got to be fit in a sense.

I try to be healthy. I train three days a week with a trainer. But I do like to eat, clearly. And I do eat dessert every day. If I cut that out, yes, I would lose weight.

I love rapping. I do. My styling's similar to Missy Elliott - I think she's so dope. In a weird way, that's how I first learned the American accent: doing American rap songs.

I stay fat because it just wouldn't be fair to all the thin people if I were this good-looking, intelligent, funny, and thin. It's a public service really.