I didn't know there were so many ghosts in [New] York.

When I was little, I met Ronald Reagan. I think I said something to him. He was talking about somebody - he said somebody was like the Clint Eastwood of something, and I said, "I thought he was the Arnold Schwarzenegger," or "more like Arnold Schwarzenegger." He just looked at me like I was crazy. He didn't know what I was talking about.

I used to kiss things all the time. I would have to kiss everything, just about everything. The headboard on my bed, the steering wheel in my car. I think it was an OCD thing.

When I was little, my dad was in the Air Force. He introduced me to Neil Armstrong, and Neil Armstrong signed my moon book. I had a little moon book, which I still have somewhere, and he signed it, and he died. It's true.

I went right to Chicago to do improv [after law school], but I wish I had gone, "Let me just bypass this law thing." I mean, sure, it helps you read a contract, but I can read a contract regardless. It's just common sense, contracts.

That's why whenever I have a really good idea, I'm always worried about theft.

I did pass the bar in Pennsylvania. I can practice Amish law. But it's long expired, my bar license.