The future of our relationship hinged on advice from a fifteen-year old girl, a probably untrue story from a one-eyed Chihuahua trainer, and me unromantically – yet skillfully – kissing you on top of silverware and china?

You make learning fun. Like a children’s book or after school special. Tell me about your…um, Athenian women.

Having your own, um, cave at eighteen is pretty cool.

I fought against her, trying to mount some kind of defense, but it was like fighting Dimitri on crack.

Eddie became about one percent less tense.

Adrian's face was the picture of perfect politeness and restraint, meaning something disastrous was about to happen.

Immortals are, by definition, immortal. End of story.