There's my baby!" I cried, quite carried away, "There's my poochiekins!" ... "Sadie," My dad said firmly, "Please do not refer to the devourer of souls as 'poochiekins'.

It's not bad enough I am exiled? It's not bad enough you take away the few good heroes I'm allowed to meet? You think it's funny to send me this this ― this charbroiled runt of a boy to ruin my tranquility? This is NOT FUNNY! Take him back!

I had weird dreams full of barnyard animals. Most of them wanted to kill me. The rest wanted food.

There's no point in defending camp if you guys die. All our friends are here.

Frank didn’t drop you on purpose,” she said. “He’s not like that. He’s just a little clumsy sometimes.” “Oops,” Leo said, in his best Frank Zhang voice. “Dropped Leo into a squad of enemy soldiers. Dang it!

I could hear hopefulness in her voice, but also doubt. She was waiting for me to admit the obvious: I’d forgotten. I was toast. I was boyfriend roadkill.

Families are messy. Immortal families are eternally messy. Sometimes the best we can do is to remind each other that we're related for better or for worse...and try to keep the maiming and killing to a minimum.