If I were a headmaster, I would get rid of the history teacher and get a chocolate teacher instead and my pupils would study a subject that affected all of them.

You ignorant little slug!" the Trunchbull bellowed. "You witless weed! You empty-headed hamster! You stupid glob of glue!

I'm wondering what to read next." Matilda said. "I've finished all the children's books.

Well not exactly," the father said."Nobody could do that. but it didn't take me long.

I like enthusiasts of any kind.

Eschew all those beastly adjectives.

Do you know what breakfast cereal is made of? It's made of all those little curly wooden shavings you find in pencil sharpeners!