My greatest regret as a writer is that I've never been able to include as many jokes as I'd like.

You can always spot a fool, for he is a man who will tell you he knows who is going to win an election.

What a heap of ash most political careers amount to, when one really stops to consider them!

Politics? Boring? Politics is history on the wing! What other sphere of human activity calls forth all that is most noble in men's souls, and all that is most base? Or has such excitement? Or more vividly exposes our strengths and weaknesses? Boring? You might as well say that life itself is boring!

Egyptologists, skilled in piecing together the papyri of lost civilisations, suddenly discovered that the same talent could be applied to working out the pattern of German radio traffic.

Humans have changed little over time. We think we've invented the modern world but they were making better speeches 2,000 years ago and grappling with issues of empire and terrorism.

Politics is never a victory, it's just the remorseless grinding forward of events.