I felt it would to add a great deal to my legend for eccentricity.

I am as fond of colorful language as anyone, but I try not to inflict it upon strangers. I suspect many people sense they should have better manners, and need only a nudge. In high school, I was addressed for the first time in my life as "Mister Ebert" by Stanley Hynes, an English teacher, and his formality transformed his classroom into a place where a certain courtliness prevailed.

(Guy) Pearce, as the hero, makes the mistake of trying to give a good and realistic performance. (Jeremy) Irons at least knows what kind of movie he's in, and hams it up accordingly.

Dogs remember every favor you ever do for them and store those events in a memory bank titled Why My Human Is A God.

Never marry anyone you could not sit next to during a three-day bus trip.

We exist to have our wealth moved up the economic chain out of our reach.

The problem with being sure that God is on your side is that you can't change your mind, because God sure isn't going to change His.