You would open a drawer, which my father had jammed full of newspapers, and the bottom would drop out. There were buttons and screws and nails and bottle caps and jar lids – the drawer of jar lids! Why? Because they're made of metal and maybe there'll be another war and we'll need the metal. A friend of mine – I quote him in the book – says, 'You have found the source of the river eBay.'

I cannot stand superheroes. I do not understand any of its appeal. It has just bored me to death since I was a little kid.

I always imagined my little cartoons on plates for some reason.

I think maybe to survive, I mean to just get through the day - I'm not saying that everything is hilariously funny.

I putter. I nurse old grudges. I fold origami while nursing old grudges. I think about the past. I wonder if there’s any grudges I should start.

Childhood - that was not my favorite time in my life.

Even under the best of circumstances - in twenty-first century America at least - caring for elderly parents ain't no place for sissies.