The establishment's gonna come together to protect themselves regardless of ideology.

Hillary [Clinton] doesn't have a fascinating story to get behind. She doesn't fascinating story to tell. The only thing about Hillary is, you know, "first female president."

There may be evidence the Russians are trying to tamper with elections. The Russians are trying to infiltrate everything we do, and they've succeeded. They've infiltrated Hollywood, they've infiltrated our universities, probably try to infiltrate elections by who knows what. But the idea that there is evidence that Putin was actively trying to elect Trump, there isn't a morsel of evidence for that, yet it shows up. The truth of the matter is that Putin doesn't care who runs the United States. It doesn't matter to him.

I thought you liberals cared about people, but here you're perfectly content to get them addicted to tobacco and make them pay taxes through the nose and continue to pay taxes through the nose and raise their taxes. And then you try to make 'em think you care about 'em by running PSAs telling them how they shouldn't smoke and how they should quit. You're exactly right. If they really cared, they would ban the product, but they can't, because the revenue from tobacco taxes - I'm not kidding you - funds children's health care programs, and a number of other things as well.

Government shutdowns do not actually become what the term implies. Two-thirds of the government cannot shut down. We're only talking about the third of government that's discretionary spending, and even at that, nobody loses their jobs, and nobody loses their Thanksgiving turkey. The whole thing has resulted from the Republican Party thinking they bought the farm back in 1995.

Come on, let's face it. Jeans are like a Volvo or a Saab, or Prius, it's a liberal status symbol. Jeans are liberal status symbols. I know everybody wears 'em now. It's another battle we've lost. We run around looking like a bunch of hippies, and I'm not going to do it.

Who's driving this business that the Russians hacked the election? It's the Democrat Party. It's Hillary Clinton. It's Obama. It's all those people who just can't accept that they lost.