The people who say: 'You are what you eat' have always seemed addled to me. In my opinion, you are what you think, and if you don't think, you can eat all the meat in Kansas City and still be nothing but a vegetable.

A solved problem creates two new problems, and the best prescription for happy living is not to solve any more problems.

The sinister nature of the American soil is apparent in places like Gettysburg. Fertilize it with the blood of heros, and it brings forth a frozen-custard stand.

Humans treat time as a map and always know where they are located on it and respond with the appropriate emotion.

It's good for the soul to hear yourself as others hear you, and next time maybe, just maybe, you will not talk so much, so loudly, so brilliantly, so charmingly, so utterly shamelessly foolishly.

Except for politics, no business is scrutinized more exhaustively than journalism.

Research is a scientific activity dedicated to discovering what makes grass green.