I am the enfant terrible of literature and science. If I cannot, and I know I cannot, get the literary and scientific bigwigs to give me a shilling, I can, and I know I can, heave bricks into the middle of them.

We all love best not those who offend us least, but those who make it most easy for us to forgive them.

There should be asylums for habitual teetotalers, but they would probably relapse into teetotalism as soon as they got out.

Any fool can tell the truth, but it requires a man of some sense to know how to lie well.

There are two classes [of scientists], those who want to know, and do not care whether others think they know or not, and those who do not much care about knowing, but care very greatly about being reputed as knowing.

Business should be like religion and science; it should know neither love nor hate.

Nature. As the word is now commonly used it excludes nature's most interesting productions-the works of man. Nature is usually taken to mean mountains, rivers, clouds and undomesticated animals and plants. I am not indifferent to this half of nature, but it interests me much less than the other half.