It's just a crazy damned life, that's all.

Do you have any idea how much an elephant drinks?

Jacob: I've never seen so much manure. Wade: Baggage stock horses. They pack'em in 27 a car. Jacob: how do you stand the smell? Wade: what smell?

...poking a lump of red Jello that jiggles outrageously, like a breast I once knew.

He stares at me, and then leans back in his chair. "He's ill, Jacob." I say nothing. "He's a paragon schnitzophonic." "He's what?!" "Paragon schnitzophonic," repeats Uncle Al. "You mean paranoid schizophrenic?" "Sure. Whatever. But the bottom line is he's mad as a hatter.

I don't like outlining, because books are organic things. Sometimes a book doesn't want to be written in a certain way.

I stare at her for a long moment. I want to kiss her. I want to kiss her more than I've ever wanted anything in my life.