Like life isn't complicated enough. You should at least be able to follow the signs.

Now, see," Wes said, nodding at my plate, "this is going to blow your mind." I looked at him. "It's a waffle, not the second coming.

If you expect the worst, you'll never be disappointed.

You’re always a kid around your parents… Unless they’re acting like children. Then you don’t get the chance.

I wondered if emotions were like menstrual cycles, if you get enough women together. Give it time, and everyone was crying.

My first signing was at my hometown independent bookstore and everyone in the world came. It was so nice. My family was there, my parents, everybody I worked with, all my friends. So I had this great first reading with a like hundred people there.

There's a kind of radar that you get, after years of being talked about and made fun of by other people. You can almost smell it when it's about to happen, can recognize instantly the sound of a hushed voice, lowered just enough to make whatever is said okay. I had only been in Colby for a few weeks. But I had not forgotten.