Politics has slain its thousands, but religion has slain its tens of thousands.

A laugh is the loud echo of a sigh; a sigh the faint echo of a laugh.

There's nothing so passionate as a vested interest disguised as an intellectual conviction.

Oh Lord, give us a sense of humor with courage to manifest it forth, so that we may laugh to shame the pomps, the vanities, the sense of self-importance of the Big Fellows that the world sometimes sends among us, and who try to take our peace away.

Here we have bishops, priests, and deacons, a Censorship Board, vigilant librarians, confraternities and sodalities, Duce Maria, Legions of Mary, Knights of this Christian order and Knights of that one, all surrounding the sinner's free will in an embattled circle.

There's no reason to bring religion into it. I think we ought to have as great a regard for religion as we can, so as to keep it out of as many things as possible.

Nothing seems too high or low for the humorist; he is above honor, above faith, preserving sense in religion and sanity in life.