There's no greater way to gain an audience's sympathy than by being unfortunate.

There are two kinds of people in this world: Michael Jackson fans and losers.

I love acting. Acting's always been my first love. I grew up watching multi-camera television shows... And I thought I would absolutely be in for that.

I'm not interested in becoming a bigger star, I'm not interested in being the wealthiest guy in the world. I'm doing fine, I love acting, and I want to do it for the rest of my life.

God is, to me, pretty much a myth created over time to deny the idea that we're all responsible for our own actions.

I think people always appreciate somebody else's informed educated opinion. To the degree that anybody with a computer can offer a journalistic point of view whether or not they have a degree, it sort of alters the validity of you have to place on anyone's individual comment.

Jeff Ross has a new show on Comedy Central where he roasts the news. It'll be perfect for people who find Jon Stewart too handsome and funny.