A writer from ESPN magazine once described me as the world's largest eleven-year-old. That's true. I ride my Sea-Doo jet ski, play putt-putt golf, go to water parks, and act silly. On the bottom floor of my house in Beverly Hills, I have video games, a pool table, a Pepsi machine, and all the things they have in arcades. I drive go-karts, at least the ones I can fit in. I karate-chop my friends when they come over, like the Kato dude in the Pink Panther movies.

Jealous punks can't stop my dunks.

The day I stopped worrying about stats is the day I started winning

Y'all reporters like my quotes, don't you. Yeah, my quotes are Shaqalicious.

It's my job to make him look good. He's a very good looking man, so it's my job to keep him looking good.

It's pretty much the same; it's just that Phil was very weird with his system. This is more of the traditional system.

Stats don't matter. I care about winning, not stats. If I score 0 points and we win I'm happy. If I score 50, 60 points, break the records, and we lose, I'm pissed off. 'Cause I knew I did something wrong. I'll have a hell of a season if I win the championship and average 20 points a game.