We want you all to be in shape and look as good as me. Because I will be walking naked on the beach.

Last time I looked at a [pay]check, I said to myself, 'Who the hell is FICA? And when I meet him, I'm going to punch him in the face. Oh my God, FICA is killing me.'

I told my wife the other day, I'm the Halle Berry of the NBA. Everybody wants this, baby. Everybody wants me.

But that is the only thing that slows me down is the system. No one, two or three was big enough to slow me down, only the system. It was the system that slowed me down to make my numbers fall. Not because I am older.

This is my disguise, but it doesn't work.

Nobody's going to tell me how to be different, so stop asking me. Stop asking me what two-plus-two is. Everybody knows two-plus-two is five.

I know how to turn the bad into good always.