It was a weird game. There was ugly shooting and a lot of turnovers and mistakes, and we were just fortunate to get the win. I should have done better, but it was just a very ugly and weird game... I knew the game was going to be an ugly game when I saw those three guys at the scorer's table. Ugly people call ugly games.

We know what we have to do. I know I have to get up in the morning, put my underwear on first and then put my pants on first. I don't need people to tell me that.

There is no answer to the Pythagorean theorem. Well, there is an answer, but by the time you figure it out, I got 40 points, 10 rebounds and then we're planning for the parade.

I'm a season kind of guy - not the preseason but the regular season.

As my great friend Aristotle said, 'If you cannot command, you must learn to listen.' I'm not the hierarchy here. I am a worker bee.

The stats win nothing. I'm still sexy. I'm still great.

You know how I be. Last week Kobe couldn't do without me.