That dude scored 8 points in the last 19 seconds, pulled out a miracle win at the Garden. He made me choke on a chicken bone that day. I'm serious.

There will be a report coming out, and my name will be on it.

Now, if you're an NBA fan, you know what Vince Carter did. I came up with a line about him: 'Half-man, half-amazing.'

I'm known as The Big Baryshnikov.

I'm going back to the old Shaq. I was normal last year - I was an earthling last summer. I had to go back to my alien roots.

I want to go to police academy, I want to actually go out and make a couple of arrests. I want to go undercover.

I don't take anything personal. I just have a certain file in my head, so Earthlings must be careful with what they say.