There are some things I don't understand about Jess and never will. No wedding dress. No flowers. No photo album. No champagne. The only thing she got out of her wedding was a husband. (I mean, obviously the husband is the main point when you get married. Absolutely. That goes without saying. But still, not even a new pair of shoes?)

You never know how things are going to turn out, however much you plan. But you already know that.

A party like this isn't about the surprise factor. It's about someone going to so much trouble that it just... overwhelms you.

Every time I mention her, Magnus says, "Are you two getting along?" in raised, hopeful tones, like we're endangered pandas who need to make a baby.

We all fail to appreciate each day just how much we already possess. Light, air, freedom, the companionship of friends.

Suddenly I've had enough of all this. I've had enough of being made to feel insecure and paranoid and wondering what's going on

Becky! Love!" Mum has pushed her way through her dancing guests to reach me. "What's wrong? Has labor started?" Honestly. My family has no idea about contemporary urban street dance trends.