I know that things get worse before they get better because that’s what my psychiatrist says, but this is a worse that feels too big.

Why do I and everyone I love pick people who treat us like we're nothing"; - "We accept the love we think we deserve.

And she says she wants to expose me to all these great things. And to tell you the truth, I don't really want to be exposed to all these great things if it means that I'll have to hear Mary Elizabeth talk about all the great things she exposed me to all the time. I don't understand that. I would give someone a record so they could love the record, not so they would always know that I gave it to them.

Then, I turned around and walked to my room and closed my door and put my head under my pillow and let the quiet put things where they are supposed to be.

I feel like a big faker because I've been putting my life back together, and nobody knows.

The inside jokes weren't jokes anymore. they had become stories

When we were all getting ready to leave, I walked up to my grandfather and gave him a hug and kiss on the cheek. He wiped my lip print off with his palm and gave me a look. He doesn't like the boys in the family to touch him. But I'm very glad that I did it anyway in case he dies. I never got to do that with my Aunt Helen.