The service took place on one of those afternoons that occur only in the past.

I now accept that it is looking increasingly likely that Tiger Woods is, in fact, straight.

You don't get depressed because bad things happen to you. That's getting pissed off and annoyed. That's reasonable. Someone hits you in the face you go ow, you know that's... but depression is something that happens like weather to you inside you.

I may have looked happy but inside I was hopelessly depressed.

Nowadays a lot of what was wrong with me would no doubt be ascribed to Attention Deficit Disorder, tartrazine food colouring, dairy produce and air pollution. A few hundred years earlier it would have been demons, still the best analogy I think, but not much help when it comes to a cure.

Sometimes there just isn't enough vomit in the world.

Coming out as gay was an easy enough matter for me, since I worked in a profession where being gay had a long history of being accepted.