If I were to believe in a god l would believe in gods. I think monotheism is the really ghastly thing. That is the absolutely staggering to me misapprehension.

That one can love another of the same gender, that is what the homophobe really cannot stand.

A month's salary, deep regret, the telephone number of some foul rehab clinic and my lance was free.

I like to think of myself at home in the armchair, writing, smoking and occasionally wandering down the shop.

Hell, I am young. I am free. My teeth are clean. The sun shines. To hell with everything else

Naturally I've known girlies form an attachment to the younger male before now, but in the tennis score of the bedroom most girls in my experience would rather Love Thirty or Love Forty than Love Fifteen. Men, of course, are a whole other issue; they start at Love All and stay there until they're dragged from the court

When you've seen a nude infant doing a backward somersault you know why clothing exists.