Picture this scene. A critic arrives at the gates of heaven. 'And what did you do?' asks Saint Peter. 'Well', says the dead soul. 'I criticised things'. 'I beg your pardon?' 'You know, other people wrote things, performed things, painted things and I said stuff like, "thin and unconvincing", "turgid and uninspired", "competent and serviceable,"...you know'.

Because, let's face it, I do not get offered the parts that Brad Pitt has just turned down.

It's extremely unlucky to be superstitious, for no other reason than it is always unlucky to be colossally stupid.

There's no doubt that I do have extremes of mood that are greater than just about anybody else I know.

The point about manic depression or bipolar disorder, as it's now more commonly called, is that it's about mood swings. So, you have an elevated mood. When people think of manic depression, they only hear the word depression. They think one's a depressive. The point is, one's a manic-depressive.

I feel I would love to close down for a number of years in some way and just be in the country making pork pies and chutneys and never have to poke my head out of the parapet.

Stop wanting wealth and fame and start wanting instead to do something well about which you are passionate